Free Now

I didn't notice when the walls came up around me--
Too busy looking out the windows of my cell,
Shaking my head at the prodigal,
So proud of where I stood,
Thinking I deserved a madrigal
For a life of lifeless good.

I was not free yet.
I'd pushed my Lord aside.
The prison of my making,
I claimed that He assigned.
I could not see yet—
I had so much to hide—
My heart, my soul, and my mind,
All longed to be free.

I could not miss the walls now; they were everywhere.
I lived my life from deep behind the bars.
Angry—oh so angry—
That no one would give me
A happy end for my conformity.
Still I was not free.

No, still not free yet—
Jesus waited at the side—
Waiting to be the only One
I cried for when I cried.
I could not see yet
My tears could all be dried—
My heart, my soul, my mind—
Were a cry from being free.

In the darkness then I saw an apparition,
Of one Who's face was bruised—Who's hands were scarred.
He didn't fit my text book definition;
The life of faith—why should it be so hard?
But Jesus handed me a key—the key to my despair—
He said, “My child! Unlock the door! I never left you there!”

And I am free now!
Walking by His side—
The prison of my making,
All but left behind.
I can see now
With nothing to hide—
My heart, my soul, my mind—
And I am free!